49 The coffee morning

The whole thing has been a terrible mistake.  I can see that now.  I'm unpacking a large box of books that Literary Friend (dovegreyreader) has begged or bullied off authors for my Macmillan coffee morning.  They're wonderful and I can't have any of them. There's boxed editions of Susan Hill's books, a boxed facsimile of a story written and illustrated by John Betjeman as a child, large colourful children's books by Meg Rosoff and Adele Geras and paperbacks by all three, every one of them signed.  I ring Literary Friend.  'I want them all' I wail.  'So do I' she agrees, 'but I've counted them' - here her voice takes on a warning note - 'and if they're not all on display for the auction or the raffle I'll know.'  You don't mess with Literary Friend.

After a last lingering look I go to the computer to compose blurbs to place alongside the books, just in case people don't realise what gems they are.  The biogs turn out to be truly amazing - Whitbreads and Carnegies abound and that's before I even start on the other awards.  I'm just pondering the possibility of vaguely implying that I hover around the fringes of this illustrious literary circle should anyone ask, when I'm brought down to earth by the bleeping of the reminder on my mobile.  My rendez-vous with the village hall tea urn lady.

When I get there she's standing expectantly outside the hall.  As I park she disappears and emerges with the urn.  'If the light goes out' she says darkly, as we stow it into the boot, 'Just tip it on its side and press the switch on the bottom.'  I'm still mulling this over when she adds, 'after emptying it of course.'  I drive home, bleakly wondering if it might just be easier to serve up 45 coffees with a rotating conveyor belt of kettles after all.

On the day the sun shines, the tea urn behaves itself and the coffee and conversation flow.  The cake stall, craft stall and raffle all seem to be doing a brisk trade.  My biggest worry - how to squeeze everyone into one of our small rooms for the auction - is solved.  We fling open the doors and everyone spills happily out onto the warm patio.

Literary Friend who writes a daily blog, and is therefore much quicker off the mark than me, has already written about it all in her own inimitable style.  As I know some of you read both her blog, http://dovegreyreader.typepad.com and mine I'm going to lift those passages straight out.

As well as a raffle at the Macmillan Coffee morning there was also an auction and the weather so perfect today it was held in the garden.Amongst the most sought after lots some signed boxed editions generously donated by Long Barn Books as well as paintings by local artists.
The men donned their aprons and turned out in force for the event.
Bookhound took to the kitchen sink and the washing up as if he'd been doing it all his life and Mr Gettingitoffmychest did a fabulous support act as auctioneer's assistant.Sue Ward's superb pictures fetched great prices once Mr GIOMC held them up the right way.There had apparently been no need to carry out threats to burn down Robin Armstrong's Lopwell Studio, he contributed one of his beautifully detailed paintings most willingly and fierce bidding erupted out of nowhere between a previously happily married couple. They are probably now arguing about where to hang it and I still can't remember who won.
I doubt Susan Hill's books have ever been described more eloquently or sold more persuasively than by John, who had secretly heard Susan being interviewed about her latest book on the radio the day before and was suddenly the world's expert, stunning us all with his preparation and knowledge.Cash in the Attic and Flog It have nothing on this man, he is a natural with the gavel and developed the happy knack of adding an extra ten pounds to the price for every twitch and scratch he could spot. Bidders then cajoled again with the carrot of the free box to keep the book in.
Much laughter and jollity and a great sum of money raised from a small gathering who all remembered with great fondness the absent friend much-missed by all who was to have been there too.

Friday, October 19, 2007 | Permalink | Comments (0)

When everyone's gone Husband, Daughter and I slump round the table, pleased but exhausted.  We divide up the pots and start counting the takings.  After the third recount (remember we are all tired) we agree that the cake stall made £91, the craft stall £46, the raffle £141, the auction £412 and general donations take the total up to an amazing £1025.53p!  Now if that doesn't impress Macmillan....

The whole thing has been a terrible mistake.  I can see that now.  I'm unpacking a large box of books that Literary Friend (dovegreyreader) has begged or bullied off authors for my Macmillan coffee morning.  They're wonderful and I can't have any of them. There's boxed editions of Susan Hill's books, a boxed facsimile of a story written and illustrated by John Betjeman as a child, large colourful children's books by Meg Rosoff and Adele Geras and paperbacks by all three, every one of them signed.  I ring Literary Friend.  'I want them all' I wail.  'So do I' she agrees, 'but I've counted them' - here her voice takes on a warning note - 'and if they're not all on display for the auction or the raffle I'll know.'  You don't mess with Literary Friend.

After a last lingering look I go to the computer to compose blurbs to place alongside the books, just in case people don't realise what gems they are.  The biogs turn out to be truly amazing - Whitbreads and Carnegies abound and that's before I even start on the other awards.  I'm just pondering the possibility of vaguely implying that I hover around the fringes of this illustrious literary circle should anyone ask, when I'm brought down to earth by the bleeping of the reminder on my mobile.  My rendez-vous with the village hall tea urn lady.

When I get there she's standing expectantly outside the hall.  As I park she disappears and emerges with the urn.  'If the light goes out' she says darkly, as we stow it into the boot, 'Just tip it on its side and press the switch on the bottom.'  I'm still mulling this over when she adds, 'after emptying it of course.'  I drive home, bleakly wondering if it might just be easier to serve up 45 coffees with a rotating conveyor belt of kettles after all.

On the day the sun shines, the tea urn behaves itself and the coffee and conversation flow.  The cake stall, craft stall and raffle all seem to be doing a brisk trade.  My biggest worry - how to squeeze everyone into one of our small rooms for the auction - is solved.  We fling open the doors and everyone spills happily out onto the warm patio.

Literary Friend who writes a daily blog, and is therefore much quicker off the mark than me, has already written about it all in her own inimitable style.  As I know some of you read both her blog, http://dovegreyreader.typepad.com and mine I'm going to lift those passages straight out.

As well as a raffle at the Macmillan Coffee morning there was also an auction and the weather so perfect today it was held in the garden.Amongst the most sought after lots some signed boxed editions generously donated by Long Barn Books as well as paintings by local artists.
The men donned their aprons and turned out in force for the event.
Bookhound took to the kitchen sink and the washing up as if he'd been doing it all his life and Mr Gettingitoffmychest did a fabulous support act as auctioneer's assistant.Sue Ward's superb pictures fetched great prices once Mr GIOMC held them up the right way.There had apparently been no need to carry out threats to burn down Robin Armstrong's Lopwell Studio, he contributed one of his beautifully detailed paintings most willingly and fierce bidding erupted out of nowhere between a previously happily married couple. They are probably now arguing about where to hang it and I still can't remember who won.
I doubt Susan Hill's books have ever been described more eloquently or sold more persuasively than by John, who had secretly heard Susan being interviewed about her latest book on the radio the day before and was suddenly the world's expert, stunning us all with his preparation and knowledge.Cash in the Attic and Flog It have nothing on this man, he is a natural with the gavel and developed the happy knack of adding an extra ten pounds to the price for every twitch and scratch he could spot. Bidders then cajoled again with the carrot of the free box to keep the book in.
Much laughter and jollity and a great sum of money raised from a small gathering who all remembered with great fondness the absent friend much-missed by all who was to have been there too.

Comments

[Karen Howlett]

£1000+ for a coffee morning is a tremendous result. Well done!!